How to buy the perfect Gifts

How to buy the perfect Gifts

From edible undies to car vacuums – new research has shown that an awful lot of us are getting it completely wrong when it comes to buying our loved-ones the perfect gifts. But why are we so clueless – and how can we get it right?

According to Patricia Davidson, author of the Shopaholics Guide to Buying Gorgeous Gifts, there is a simple knack to buying great gifts: research.

When Tim, a 49-year-old accountant from North Yorkshire, recalls his biggest present-buying faux pas, he cringes. "I thought I was doing a good thing," he recalls. "In the run-up to her 40th birthday, my wife kept asking if she needed a facelift and multiple variations on that theme. Browsing the department store, I saw some expensive anti-aging cream advertising itself as a facelift in a bottle. I thought it was a stroke of genius. My wife literally threw it back in my face. Luckily, I ducked. One dint in the door later, I realised how my well-intentioned gift might have been misinterpreted."

Sarah, 28, a PR account manager from London, also had a shock when her husband Lee, 33, got it wrong in the Christmas present-buying stakes. "It was our first Christmas together and he asked my dear dad for advice. Dad knows how bad my cooking is and suggested a microwave to save me going hungry when Lee was working evening shifts.

"When I saw a huge, beautifully-wrapped box a few days before Christmas I couldn't stop guessing what it was. I said, 'please tell me it's not something useful, like a microwave'. My face was a picture on Christmas morning. Luckily, Lee whipped out the largest bottle of Chanel No5 known to man and a gorgeous gold necklace - a last minute shopping spree on the back of my microwave comment saved his bacon. He's never bought anything practical or taken advice from my dad again."

Tim and Lee aren't the only Britons struggling to buy gifts for their loved ones. According to research by AE Platinum Cashback Credit Card, up to three quarters of British women say their partners get it wrong every time they buy them a gift – 4% of respondents even admitted 'romantic' gifts like battery chargers and staple guns had led to divorce or separation.

"There are two reasons men get it wrong," explains Patricia Davidson author of the Shopaholic's Guide to Buying Gorgeous Gifts Online, "they either don't allow enough time or don't think about the person they are buying for. A present that isn't relevant to the recipient might as well not be given."

The research by American Express Platinum Cashback Credit Card also reveals that men are just as likely to be presented with unwanted gifts such as hair dye, male make-up and car vacuums, with 10% of men polled saying they will sell unwanted gifts on e-Bay.

Patricia agrees that women are not perfect present buyers. "They make exactly the same mistakes as men," she says. "The first gift I bought for my husband was a gorgeous sheepskin coat that I loved – but he didn't. He politely asked if he could take it back."

According to Patricia, there is a simple knack to buying great gifts – research. "Think about things your partner buys for his or herself, as well as their personal style, hobbies and interests," says Patricia. "If you pay attention, it becomes obvious. Guessing causes the problems, and choosing gifts just because you like them is a no-no. Your own taste is irrelevant. If you're struggling, ask friends and family for hints and advice – but there's no substitute for your own research."

In a recession, spending money on an appropriate and appreciated present is a sound financial transaction. The handbag your partner has been dreaming about for months, or a rare graphic novel by his favourite artist, is the way to go. "In this climate," says Patricia, "there's an argument for buying people things they need, as opposed to things they want. If money is short, a voucher may be appreciated, and treats like a side of salmon or bottle of champagne may work well for friends or family. Unless someone expressly asks for it, kitchen or household equipment is best avoided."

Patricia says asking someone outright what they want is a "last resort" but urges gift-buyers to talk to the parents when choosing for other people's kids. "I don't even choose gifts for my own kids until I know exactly what they want," she admits.

Once you're armed with information for the perfect present, the prospect of fighting with hoards of Christmas shoppers may fill you with dread. Patricia strongly recommends shopping online, allowing enough time for delivery, and ordering before stocks are depleted if you're buying a popular toy or video game.

"Getting a gift wrong leaves both you and the recipient in an awkward position," Patricia says. "Getting it right on the other hand, and knowing how delighted your loved ones are with the gifts you've chosen, is a fabulous feeling."